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How To Breathe And Lead Your Team With Positive Questions

Category: Leadership

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Why: We want to tell you about what it takes to be an empathetic leader so that your team has a positive working environment.

You are responsible for the energy you are bringing into the room.

Reading materials

  • “Dare to Lead” from Brene Brown (and all her other books)
  • “Time to think” from Nancy Kline
  • “Don’t just do something, stand there” from Marvin Weisbord
  • “A handbook for revolution: Empathy” from Roman Krznaric
  • “Emotional agility” from Susan David

In a flash, here is how you do it!

In Short

The problem is we perceive the same event in our own way. That is our world, and no one else can really understand and share the exact same experience.

This is supposed to be complicated. We are in our own head for 99.99% of the time. To practice empathy is to get out of your head and step in other shoes: That is very uncomfortable.

Below are some tips to go about this seemingly impossible task.

1. Practice Self-centering

By centering yourself, you are again observing yourself: body, emotion, and mind.

Why? It puts you out of default reactive mode and allows you to take control of the energy flow. It is the way to become your best self, as you take charge of what you can control as much as you can.

2. Direct The Energy Flows

When starting the meeting

  • Ask to observe the members’ attention: “What has your attention?”
  • Ask to lead them to thinking and feel positivity: “What are you thankful for this morning?”

Energy flows where attention goes!
Lead with positive questions.

When facing conflict

  • Take a breath in and out
  • Center your innerself by put attention to your posture
  • Ask how your counterpart feels about the problem
  • Pause…..
  • Then, finally tell your point of view

Notice: making a pause with breathing!

The key is to breathe and get out of reactive mode, switch to an active mode of asking positive questions.

3. Become Strong Enough First

To be empathic with others, you have to be empathic with yourself first. If you cannot manage your feeling and face conflicts, you can’t be any use and empathic about others’ conflicts either.

So work on yourself first, become more robust. Then, when you are strong enough, people will seek help from you.

man and woman holding battle ropes


Learning to center yourself with breathing practice and to direct energy flow with questions. Putting yourself in a driver’s seat is the best way to lead.

Now go practice your breathing at every encounter.