Keeping house while drowning is common even to the best of us.
Table of Contents
Action: Do it. “Good enough” is Perfect.
3 Key Concepts
- Split one task into multiple steps.
- Learn self-compassion; flaws are common.
- Your space exists to serve you.
Before You Can Keep House While Drowning
Pre-reading material: strugglecare.com, self-compassion.org
First, we have to realize that there is a problem with how things are usually done. There is friction. Most of us have an expectation that the house will have to be kept 100% clean at all times. And it can only be done by major top to bottom cleaning sessions.
How Does One Keep House Clean?
Lower your bar of perfection to the small actionable tasks. Take pride in a small success. You have to believe in momentum and what it can do.
This book suggests ways to motivate you to clean, to lower the bar for yourself. Increases the chance of success in cleaning. This is also a fight against your own ego. Let yourself wipe the table and be done with it.
Deconstruct is The Art of Simplification
Cleaning anything requires too much effort. So instead, split them down into pieces. Still not flowing naturally? Break down further.
- Put used clothes in the basket.
- Put it in the washer.
- Take out detergent.
- Take out the softener.
- …
We are Imperfect.
While self-esteem is about comparing and knowing that you are better than the average. Self-compassion is the opposite. It is about seeing that we are all flawed and must be kind to ourselves on these facts.
In this case, learn about how you tend to procrastinate after a meal or during a certain TV show. And account for these temptations. Then, make it as easy as possible for your imperfect self to carry on cleaning.
Trick: do something that would make you like yourself, start enjoying yourself, and automatically take care of yourself.
Believe it or not, not liking yourself is the definition of low self-esteem. To ask anybody to take care of someone they do not like is impossible and insane.
Think Functionality
Do not set a bar for yourself that you are a good person, so you must clean. Instead, say that I need this place to be cleaned to do tasks A, B, and C. The key is to extract your self-esteem from these cleaning tasks.
To sum up
Some comments in this book are amusing, like, “Eat something sweet. Get the blood sugar up and find a great song to put on.” Because when I did that, not only did I get fatter, I started dancing energetically, and the work is never done.
We all procrastinate not only on dishwashing or bedroom cleaning but on any daunting task in general. This book suggests we admit our flaws and work around the human mind with compassion.
You are not responsible for saving the world if you are struggling to save yourself.
KC. Davis
Check out this blog on taking care of yourself as you are responsible: Rule no. 2 of 12 Rules for Life by Jordan Peterson.
Be a good friend to others and also to yourself.
Goal check: I learned that blaming myself is not helping, and I started packing up again in small bags.
Get this book on Amazon here!